Balance
Balance.
Who else struggles with this? It seems as though every person does but we all try so hard to make it look like we have it all together.
Truth time:
Sometimes my kids make me want to pull my hair out and send me screaming. Sometimes they are so sweet and wonderful that I can't believe I created such beautiful and perfect beings. Sometimes I worry that my boys will not like me when they are adults. Sometimes I fear that they will NEVER understand how much I have given for them and would give for them.
I believe every parents thinks these things. Being someone who is very emotional and somewhat sensitive the special little moments when my kids hug me a little longer, or randomly show me some love are moments that bring life into focus. Truly, these moments are the ones that make me stop and think that the most important things in life are my family. Moments of clarity with my love and my children are the moments that help to balance out the good and the bad days.
For example. Yesterday we had to drive from Manhattan to Boston. A drive that was estimated to take four hours turned into 6+. G was unhappy and kept whining for this, that, and the other thing. Oli was just mad unless he was eating or asleep. Andy was tired from being at his conference all week and also from driving through NYC traffic....It was insane. For a moment I thought I couldn't handle it anymore. I told Andy I just wanted some silence....pure silence. He offered me his headphones and I was listening to music when he tapped my leg....G had fallen asleep, Oli was asleep and what had brought me to my almost breaking point was over. The silence in our rental car was wonderful. The ten minutes that we had of silence and just holding hands was what we both needed to recharge and re-balance. By the time we got to Boston it was time for dinner and both boys were upset again. So again we had some time of chaos quickly followed by laughing and playing....Balance.
I don't know if I will ever find the balance that I am looking for. If I will ever be able to make a list and get it all done to my own satisfaction. I do know this...My life is amazing. I am loved my the most amazing partner ever! We have two of the most beautiful and wonderful little men. What else could I ask for right? (alot) but at the moment I have some balance.
Cheers
Who else struggles with this? It seems as though every person does but we all try so hard to make it look like we have it all together.
Truth time:
Sometimes my kids make me want to pull my hair out and send me screaming. Sometimes they are so sweet and wonderful that I can't believe I created such beautiful and perfect beings. Sometimes I worry that my boys will not like me when they are adults. Sometimes I fear that they will NEVER understand how much I have given for them and would give for them.
I believe every parents thinks these things. Being someone who is very emotional and somewhat sensitive the special little moments when my kids hug me a little longer, or randomly show me some love are moments that bring life into focus. Truly, these moments are the ones that make me stop and think that the most important things in life are my family. Moments of clarity with my love and my children are the moments that help to balance out the good and the bad days.
For example. Yesterday we had to drive from Manhattan to Boston. A drive that was estimated to take four hours turned into 6+. G was unhappy and kept whining for this, that, and the other thing. Oli was just mad unless he was eating or asleep. Andy was tired from being at his conference all week and also from driving through NYC traffic....It was insane. For a moment I thought I couldn't handle it anymore. I told Andy I just wanted some silence....pure silence. He offered me his headphones and I was listening to music when he tapped my leg....G had fallen asleep, Oli was asleep and what had brought me to my almost breaking point was over. The silence in our rental car was wonderful. The ten minutes that we had of silence and just holding hands was what we both needed to recharge and re-balance. By the time we got to Boston it was time for dinner and both boys were upset again. So again we had some time of chaos quickly followed by laughing and playing....Balance.
I don't know if I will ever find the balance that I am looking for. If I will ever be able to make a list and get it all done to my own satisfaction. I do know this...My life is amazing. I am loved my the most amazing partner ever! We have two of the most beautiful and wonderful little men. What else could I ask for right? (alot) but at the moment I have some balance.
Cheers
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